在逆境中如何與人交朋友并建立牢固的關系。
It can be difficult to make friends living in a big city, especially when you don’t know many people.
生活在一個大城市里是很難交到朋友的，尤其是當你還不認識很多人的時候。
Over years of experience and studying social skills, I discovered that it’s possible to make friends without even trying. There are just a few strategies that you have to use on a consistent basis.
根據多年的經驗以及對社交技能的研究，我發現其實你甚至能毫不費力地交到朋友。這里有一些你一直可以用得上的策略。
That’s what I’ll outline a few simple steps.
在這里我將列出幾個簡單的步驟。
1. Be seen without trying to get attention.
不刻意地引人注意也能獲得他人的注意。
You don’t have to say anything witty or interesting to get people’s attention, all you have to do is place yourself in environments where people will see you.
你不必說詼諧或有趣的事情來吸引人們的注意，你所要做的只是將你自己置于人們能注意到的地方。
This can be done anywhere you go, such as the supermarket or your yoga studio.
這可以在你去的任何地方奏效，比如超市或是瑜伽館。
2. Use the power of listening.
使用傾聽的力量。
There’s an interesting phenomenon that occurs when you listen to other people, they’ll keep talking. Just keep giving them good eye contact and show with your body language that you care.
有一個有趣的現象，當你聽別人說話時，他們會一直說話。只要和他們保持良好的眼神接觸，并用你的身體語言顯示出你對他們的關心。
Listening is a mechanism to build trust and likeability.
傾聽是一種建立信任和魅力的途徑。
3. Think about what you can give to the other people.
想想你能給別人什么。
So often we think about what we can get out of others when we try to make friends, but that thinking needs to be flipped around.
當我們試圖交朋友的時候，我們經常會考慮我們能從別人那里得到什么，但是我們需要扭轉這種想法。
Try offering a piece of helpful advice or invite someone you just met to grab coffee or lunch with you the following week.
試著提供一個有用的建議或邀請你剛才遇到的人來喝杯咖啡或者邀請他在接下來的一周和你一起共進午餐。
4. Always have 3 good stories to tell other people.
總是有3個好故事來告訴別人。
When you have at least a few stories to share with others, you’ll never run out of things to talk about.
當你至少有幾個故事與他人分享時，你將永遠有談不盡的話題。
5. Smile like there’s no tomorrow.
盡情微笑。
It may not be natural for some of us to smile, but a smile is one of the most attractive things that someone can display when they’re meeting new people.
對有些人來說，微笑可能是件不自然的事情，但是微笑是最有吸引力的事情之一。當結識新人時，人們可以傳遞他們的微笑。
Think about these 5 strategies as tools. They’re always available if you want to connect with people instantly and develop true lasting friendships.
我們可以把這5種策略作為工具。如果你想與人立即建立關系，并且發展成真正長久的友誼，它們總是有用的。
